Mark 10, Part 1 — God’s Design for Marriage
What Did Jesus Teach About Marriage and Divorce?
In Mark Chapter 10, Part 1, we begin a challenging and sometimes controversial passage concerning marriage and divorce.
Before examining the passage, an important clarification should be made.
This study is not intended to approach divorce from a position of judgment or condemnation.
Nor are we saying that Scripture requires a person to remain physically present in a relationship that is physically or mentally dangerous.
Healthy relationships should be characterized by love, respect, sacrifice, and safety. Abuse—whether physical, emotional, or spiritual—is contrary to those principles.
With that clarification, let’s look carefully at what Jesus teaches about God’s design for marriage.
Jesus Enters Judea
Mark 10:1 NKJV
“Then He arose from there and came to the region of Judea by the other side of the Jordan. And multitudes gathered to Him again, and as He was accustomed, He taught them again.”
Matthew records the same event:
Matthew 19:1–2 NKJV
“Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these sayings, that He departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there.”
Mark emphasizes Jesus teaching the multitudes.
Matthew emphasizes Jesus healing them.
These accounts do not need to be understood as contradictory. Teaching and healing were both characteristic parts of Jesus’ ministry.
Luke records Jesus saying:
“The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted…” — Luke 4:18
Jesus ministered to people both spiritually and physically.
The Pharisees Test Jesus About Divorce
Mark 10:2 NKJV
“The Pharisees came and asked Him, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?’ testing Him.”
Matthew provides an important additional detail:
Matthew 19:3 NKJV
“Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?”
This was not simply an innocent question seeking Jesus’ opinion.
They were testing Him.
There was debate among religious leaders concerning the permissible grounds for divorce.
Could a man divorce his wife for virtually any reason?
Jesus does not begin by entering their debate.
Instead, He takes them somewhere far more authoritative.
He takes them to Scripture.
“What Did Moses Command You?”
Jesus asks:
“What did Moses command you?” — Mark 10:3
They answer:
“Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her.” — Mark 10:4
Notice the distinction.
They speak about what Moses permitted.
Jesus takes them back to what God intended.
Jesus explains:
“Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.” — Mark 10:5
Divorce was not presented as God’s original design.
Jesus takes the conversation all the way back to creation.
Back to the Beginning
Mark 10:6–8 NKJV
“But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.”
Matthew records Jesus asking:
“Have you not read…?”
Jesus points His listeners back to Genesis.
To understand marriage, Jesus takes us back to God’s original design.
“Male and Female He Created Them”
Genesis tells us:
Genesis 1:27 NKJV
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”
Then God blessed them:
“Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it.” — Genesis 1:28
Human beings are created in the image of God.
Then Genesis 2 gives us a closer look at the creation of man and woman.
“It Is Not Good That Man Should Be Alone”
God said:
“It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” — Genesis 2:18
God creates the woman and brings her to the man.
Adam responds:
“This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.”
Then Scripture establishes the pattern:
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” — Genesis 2:24
Jesus quotes this passage directly when answering the Pharisees.
That is significant.
When questioned about divorce, Jesus begins with God’s design for marriage.
The Two Become One Flesh
Jesus says:
“So then, they are no longer two, but one flesh.” — Mark 10:8
Marriage is more than a legal agreement.
It is more than two people sharing a home.
It is more than romance.
Scripture describes husband and wife becoming:
One flesh.
Jesus concludes:
“Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” — Mark 10:9
God established marriage at creation.
Marriage Points Beyond Marriage
Paul develops this truth even further in Ephesians 5.
Before specifically addressing husbands and wives, Paul tells Christians:
“Be imitators of God as dear children.”
And:
“Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us.”
That principle matters tremendously in marriage.
Biblical love involves sacrifice.
Marriage is not simply about asking:
What am I receiving?
It also asks:
How can I love, serve, sacrifice for, nourish, and cherish my spouse?
Submit to One Another
Before addressing husbands and wives individually, Paul writes:
“Submitting to one another in the fear of God.” — Ephesians 5:21
Then Paul speaks specifically to wives and husbands.
To husbands he gives an extraordinary standard:
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.” — Ephesians 5:25
How did Christ love the Church?
Sacrificially.
Christ gave Himself for His Bride.
That is the model placed before Christian husbands.
Love Your Wife as Your Own Body
Paul continues:
“So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.” — Ephesians 5:28
Then he returns to Genesis:
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
But then Paul reveals something extraordinary.
Marriage and Christ’s Church
Ephesians 5:32 NKJV
“This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.”
Biblical marriage points beyond itself.
The relationship between husband and wife provides a picture of something greater:
Christ and His Bride, the Church.
Christ loves His Church.
Christ sacrificed Himself for His Church.
Christ nourishes and cherishes His Church.
Marriage is therefore not merely a human institution.
It points toward the Gospel.
Hardness of Heart
Why, then, was divorce permitted?
Jesus answers:
“Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.” — Mark 10:5
Matthew records:
“Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.” — Matthew 19:8
Notice again:
“From the beginning it was not so.”
Jesus distinguishes between God’s original design and provisions made because of human sin and hardness of heart.
Matthew Adds an Important Detail
Mark records Jesus saying:
“Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.”
Matthew’s account adds:
Matthew 19:9 NKJV
“Whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
The Greek term translated “sexual immorality” is porneia, referring broadly to illicit sexual activity.
Matthew therefore supplies additional information to the discussion that is not included in Mark’s abbreviated account.
God’s Design Before the Fall
Jesus continually brings the discussion back to the beginning.
Before sin entered the world:
God created.
God blessed.
God brought man and woman together.
God established the one-flesh union.
Then came the Fall.
Sin damaged humanity’s relationship with God and with one another.
Hardness of heart entered human relationships.
The effects of that brokenness continue today.
That is why Christian marriage needs more than human effort.
We need Christ.
Christ at the Center of Marriage
Marriage reaches its fullest biblical purpose when Christ is at the center.
Husbands and wives are imperfect people.
Both need grace.
Both need forgiveness.
Both need humility.
Both need the Holy Spirit.
Both need the Word of God.
Both are called to walk in love.
Ephesians 5 tells believers:
“Walk as children of light.”
“Understand what the will of the Lord is.”
“Be filled with the Spirit.”
“Submitting to one another in the fear of God.”
Those aren’t merely principles for church.
They belong in our homes.
Key Takeaways From Mark Chapter 10 Part 1
- The Pharisees tested Jesus with a controversial question about divorce.
- Jesus directed them away from human debate and back to Scripture.
- Moses permitted divorce because of hardness of heart.
- Jesus took the discussion back to God’s original design in Genesis.
- God created humanity male and female.
- God established marriage.
- Husband and wife become one flesh.
- Jesus said, “What God has joined together, let not man separate.”
- Biblical marriage is characterized by love, sacrifice, and mutual care.
- Ephesians 5 connects marriage with Christ and His Church.
- Christ’s sacrificial love for His Bride provides the model for Christian marriage.
- Matthew provides additional teaching concerning sexual immorality and divorce.
- Human sin and hardness of heart damage relationships.
- Marriage needs the grace, truth, forgiveness, and transforming work of Jesus Christ.
What God Has Joined Together
The Pharisees wanted to debate:
When can we divorce?
Jesus redirected the conversation:
What did God intend when He created marriage?
He took them back to Genesis.
Back before human traditions.
Back before their debates.
Back before the Law of Moses.
Back to the beginning.
“The two shall become one flesh.”
Marriage is God’s design.
And Paul reveals that its meaning reaches beyond husband and wife.
It points us toward:
Christ and His Church.
Next week, we will continue looking at God’s design for humanity and marriage, the meaning of hardness of heart, and the forces that seek to distort the image and purposes of God.
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